CICONIA: WHEN THEY CRY

[insinning]

It's a holy night. Silent night.

All is calm.

Everything is b r i g h t.

Comments

[dissimulative]

But...

[ Oria is at a standstill. He never thought lesser of factory-born children. A life is a life. He treats people based on his personal experiences with them, not because of their background.

Why does it feel like such a big deal now? Because reality has been turning on its head? Things Oria have known are suddenly not what they were? ]

Wait, someone over at Limbus should have your information, right? Then...

[ His voice trails off again. ]

[insinning]

...yeah. It's classified even to me. Stupid, right?

[He looks down, anxiety growing. Did this change things after all? Would Oria look at him differently.]

But if I try digging too much I get... angry. Angrier than you've ever seen me. I still don't know why.

[dissimulative]

[ With that, Oria perks up and his grip strength momentarily returns in squeezing Sinclair's hand. ]

They didn't hurt you, did they?

[insinning]

No. We stop the sessions when it seems like I'm getting too upset.

[ Even if most sessions leave him a teary mess after. He doesn't want Oria to know that though]

[dissimulative]

[ Sinclair doesn't have to tell Oria about being a teary mess when he already told him about how on the verge of him being upset would be. He knows Sinclair would cry if he got so upset to the point they have to pause the session. ]

What is the session even like? Hypnotism? How do you just... draw memories out?

[insinning]

I was working with Dr. Klara first [the infamous radical. Yeah] But her mirror therapy didn't really work for me because I don't have any clear memories. So I got referred to this new therapy where I get hooked up to some machines and... it's like I'm exploring my own mind? It's odd.

[dissimulative]

[ Sinclair now involving himself with radicals and now he has to be hooked up to machines? Again? Something about exploring his own mind gives Oria a sense of dread. ]

But you said that you stop when you start to feel upset, right? It must be hard pulling you back out of a mind exploration.

[insinning]

...mm. They keep me monitored closely and when I hit the point where my emotions seem to take over, they pull me out.

[It isn't just being upset though. It's the anger, so deep and furious it scared Sinclair to see it]</small.

[dissimulative]

... Isn't that kinda inevitable when you're possibly looking at upsetting memories? They were probably suppressed for a reason...

[ ??????????? ]

[insinning]

Mmm...but I, I get so angry...

[Oria thinks he's seen Sinclair angry before. But even that incident paled in comparison to how deeply angry Sinclair could get]

It's like I can't think anymore and...

[dissimulative]

[ Oria stays quiet, waiting for Sinclair to finish speaking. He won't interrupt his explanation nor thoughts, because Oria thinks they need to be set free into the air. ]

[insinning]

...it's like I want to get violent. And destructive to the point where there's someone I want to hurt. That's wrong, isn't it?

[Maybe it was a good thing his memories were blocked]

[dissimulative]

Generally? Yeah. But you most likely felt wronged and wanted revenge... because something big probably happened--something that can't be undone no matter what.

[ That's why Oria is more understanding about it rather than a "omg emil dont kill people thats bad". Also, he has definitely seen Sinclair angry, but to imagine something worse than that... that really would be destructive like Sinclair said. Man. ]

It's a human emotion. It's normal.

[insinning]

[Sinclair smiles a little. Maybe that's why he wanted to tell Oria. Oria could understand]

Normal, huh? [Is it? He takes Oria's hand and just rests his forehead against it]

Maybe, but...I wish I understood why.

[dissimulative]

If you did... I'm sure we wouldn't be having this chat so calmly right now, if at all.

[ He has a bit of a wry smile as he watches Sinclair rest his forehead against the hand. ]

Don't rush into it, okay? We don't need you to be extra traumatized.

[insinning]

I wont. [He looks up a little. Or at least, he'll try not to. It's hard to say what that machine will make him look at next.

Still, the thought of that person...something twists in him] But enough about me...did they ever tell you what happened to make so many gauntlet knights sick like that?

[dissimulative]

Nope. As usual, they don't tell us jack shit. I saw the notice that went out to everyone too. It read like politics bullshit as it always does.

[ Oria really doesn't want to bring up the "my mother will hear about this!!" except, she probably will and he actually doesn't want that lmao ]

I didn't notice anything weird until Katja pointed out that I was bleeding out of my nose. As I stopped and took in the situation, my mind went blank and... that's it.

[ Then he fell and Sinclair caught him. ]

[insinning]

But you were feeling unwell earlier right? Do you think that was related?

[ Of course the scientists didn't say anything to those actually impacted. Why is Sinclair even surprised? But he tries to push the pieces of the puzzle together. A strange person who claimed to know him, looking for a coin. Oria being as unwell as the factory-born knights even though he was Ciconia-born. There must have been some kind of hacker, but why?]

[dissimulative]

The day when we were watching a movie? I'm not sure...

[ Oria sure saw red when he wasn't supposed to. He thought the sword had a red matte shine. ]

What are you thinking of?

[insinning]

...I don't think I have enough proof, but...isn't it possible to implant illnesses within people? I know 8MS is tightly guarded, but if there was something like a malicious 8MS, then...

[It didn't explain why Oria was a target and how Sinclair got out unscathed. But it would explain one thing: why there had been no word on what it was. Why no one tried blaming another faction just yet.]

These days, a hacker would have to be really close, to us, right? But, if they had some kind of personal 8MS they were sending out, maybe...?

[dissimulative]

But that's impossible... 8MS would require so many resources to look into and you'd definitely get caught. 8MS security is one of the tightest security there is and it's looked over by all nations because they don't want any other country to get ahead.

[ At least, that's what Oria thinks. ]

All hackers leave behind a trace too, but... I'm not a hacker.

[ There was the little rook that tried to hack into Sinclair before, but that thing left a very tiny trace. Demian will find that it's identified as "A1". As for its owner? Instead of a secret trying to hide its existence, it just says outright that there's no owner, no controller.

... ]

[insinning]

[Was anything truly impossible? If you had enough money, and enough power, and everyone was too busy fighting with each other to look at you...]

...there was one after me, I think. Back when we were hanging out at the shops.

[Sinclair had intended on keeping quiet about it, but if that silence put Oria under further harm...Demian had wanted to keep it secret for a little longer. But Sinclair couldn't hold back anymore]

It got stopped, but the trace it left behind was "A1".

[dissimulative]

[ Okay, wait. Wait a moment. ]

Someone tried to hack you?

[ And Sinclair seems fine? Huh? Maybe Charon traded all her navigation skills for firewall defense, he thinks. ]

A1... AI? Does the letter and number imply there will be more? What the heck...

[insinning]

[ahaha...yeah. Well.]

Mm. It was like a little rook piece? I don't know. But it was like, the longer it subverting the firewalls, the more information it was able to steal.

[He's not sure if he can admit the other part yet. Oria already worried about him...]

Or...maybe multiple of them were sent out already. It feels like a grid piece.

[dissimulative]

... Do you think it's worth telling the doctors about this?

[ So that they can find possible traces of the hacker within Oria if there is one. But he's also aware that he might not get any answers out of it and be left in the dark like always because adults are just like that. Also, he wouldn't want to leak anything anything regarding Sinclair, since that seems to be sensitive information now. ]